MDC – Friday the 13th (2009 remake)

by Jim Yoho

2009 Platinum Dunes/Paramount Pictures/New Line Cinema
Writers: Damian Shannon, Mark Swifth, Mark Wheaton
Director: Marcus Nispel
Starring: Jared Padelecki, Danielle Panabaker, Amanda Righetti and Derek Mears

Two parts to this review -

Theater Experience
&
The Film Itself

Theater Experience

I arrived too late for the 7 p.m. showing as there were long lines and apparently very few theaters in the area showing the film. I think Marcus made a mistake not showing it at their larger theater on a bigger screen, at least for Friday the 13^th.

I think they vastly underestimate how many couples enjoy a good fright flick, especially before Valentine’s Day – girls like to scream and hug their guy (whether they are actually scared or not, it’s a good excuse) and guys like to feel brave and protecting of their women (whether they are actually scared themselves or not.) The theaters, and myself continuously as well, also fail to understand how many parents bring underage children to these horror films. I counted at least a dozen under 17 kids at the theater I was at, and at least 6 of those were under 12 with dad and/or mom. In any case, when Friday the 13^th opens on Friday the 13^th, you get a bigger theater.

I know most people complain about the high prices of concessions. It’s as common as complaining about taxes. And probably just as inane. Concessions are a completely voluntary part of the movie-going process – you can easily enjoy a film without a soda and popcorn. The ticket, however, is necessary – and if you want the ticket prices to stay low (relatively) then concessions is where the theaters will turn to make their money. I voluntarily get myself the highly-overpriced soda, and just mentally adjust that as actually being a $2.50 tip to the theater on top of the “acceptable” $2 price for my 32 ounces of caffeine.

I bring this up because I had to deal with many “sneaks” who brought in their own stuff last night. Plastic bags of candy that they were ripping open were perhaps the biggest annoyance.

Except for something I thought I left behind me at the Ford City Mall Theater in Chicago – booze. I assume it was alcohol, for what other kind of beverage comes in glass bottles that make the people behind you more and more giggly as the evening progresses?

Speaking of behind me – the theater was packed, and I was sitting at the end of an aisle with one space to my left. A couple came in late, looking for seats like so many others, but they were friends with the father and 3 young kids behind me (9:30 showing of R rated horror flick – not kidding here) and the father asked if I would move one seat ahead (to another aisle full save for the outside seat) and I felt amiable at that point so I did. Big mistake – the couple behind me kept talking and opening plastic bags and dropping glass bottles (they weren’t the only ones, but they were the ones behind me and most annoying.)

Not to mention I saw the flash of at least 4 different cell phones during the film – I hope some people were just checking the time, but even that . . . it pulled my attention away from the screen. My attention that was already shattered by the couple behind me.

On the plus side, maybe just shy of half-way through the film, one of the employees of the movie theater came in during the film, dressed as Jason with mask and machete, and slowly walked down to the front of the theater where he stood off to one side and watched the scene where Jason (in the film) first shows his adult face and acquires the iconic hockey mask. Then “Jason” walked back out of the theater. Most of the audience saw it and laughed – it was a good time, the kind of thing you only experience on opening night for movies and why I try to go to opening night for genre films, especially ones with followings.

The Film Itself

As I’m wont to do for bigger reviews, let me start with a few predispotions of mine. Knowing my biases will help you to parse my opinions of the film.

I am a horror film fan – monsters, slashers, “torture porn”
I have a specially love for the unkillable slashers – Jason, Michael, Leatherface – I like to think of these slashers as ‘revenants’
I have zero problems with remakes, reimaginings, or sequels
I miss the halcyon days of the 80s where horror films had the chase, the creative death, and plenty of gratuitous nudity

On to the film.

I went into the viewing with a generally optimistic outlook. I like the Friday the 13^th series, and I had really enjoyed the Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake. It would have been easy to have been let down.

From beginning to end this film did not disappoint, though it certainly did defy expectations at time. While holding onto the roots of the Jason franchise, the writers and director decided to both make a classic slasher film (I’ve missed these) but also to make a coherent story about more than “campers at Crystal Lake die.” Many of the tropes of the genre are indeed present, yet the filmmakers refused to play to most cliches of “horror” films and instead went with a fairly straightforward narrative. Really, this was one of the most cohesive slasher films I’ve ever seen.

During the opening credits we get an Incredible Hulk style “origin story” that very briefly explains about Jason’s mother, a sign that this movie will not be a remake but more of a reimagining in the same ways that Superman Returns and the aforementioned Incredible Hulk were. A pseudo-sequel to the first film of the series, but (unlike Hulk but very much like Superman) also a retelling of the first films original sequel(s). This may turn some people off who would either want a complete remake (Psycho), a complete franchise reboot (Batman Begins), or a “forget the crap that followed and just follow the good film as a true sequel” (H20) – but I myself actually find this kind of creativity refreshing. I see it all the time in anime so I’m used to it (how many versions of Tenchi exist?)

Prior to the title credits the film has a sequence with a group of campers who stumble across Jason’s stomping grounds. This is one of the points where this film, structurally, adheres to the formula but also makes a more coherent story overall. The campers aren’t just killed as an introduction to Jason – their reason for being in that spot, and later events in the film, all tie together. In fact this opening sequence is something of the reason for the rest of the story. I was pleasantly surprised.

Continuing on this line of examination, there is only one real death that felt a bit extraneous as the character killed is almost nothing but a piece of scenary, and yet even this murder has plot importance. It’s not only the point where Jason’s face is shown, it is also where Jason gets his hockey mask. On top of this, the location of the murder played a part later in the film. Whether you find the story and/or plot good or not, this is good writing. No wasted locations, no wasted scenes, and no wasted murders.

Speaking of murders, this is another area where my previous experiences and expecations were dashed. Mostly pleasantly at that. Let me enumerate:

Jason runs, and is very fast. Humanly fast, mind you, but not the slow, inexorable zombie of the genre. Gone is the mystical teleporting (as my friends and I used to refer to how someone would run and run and run through the woods with Jason lumbering behind them, and then the runner would trip and look up and in front of them inexplicably would be standing Jason)
Gone are the long, drawn out chases. Almost everyone is killed before they know what is happening, before the audience knows what is happening sometimes. There are some chases, sure, but until the very end of the film they are abbreviated. Really, the film almost completely resists the attempt to draw out huge suspense sessions.
Some of the killings are in broad daylight. Bright daylight. Again, out of nowhere almost. Slasher films have had this before, in small doses, but this film disregarded the tripe about “night time is the deadliest time.”
Jason lays traps. He uses bait. He kills people quickly and efficiently, not by the most creative method he could possibly imagine.

For this kind of film the acting was good and the characters felt developed. Again, for this kind of film. It isn’t a drama looking for an Oscar – it’s a slasher film. Don’t expect long-winded, Lost style flashbacks of story for characters. But there are distinct personalities and motivations for most of the main characters, and I could distinguish all but the two blonde friends fairly well (those girls had different personalities, but were onscreen so briefly they could have been interchanged sets of nude bodies.)

My perhaps one problem with the film itself is my problem with most horror films (save Hostel and Saw) – and that’s the ending. The very end of the film, most often in slasher but also in other horror genre offerings, is the same. This is one cliché I could have done without. I won’t “spoil” it but if you’ve consumed these kind of films you’ll already know what I’m talking about. They almost all have the same unneccesary gimmick, one that is as tiresome and annoying as the “it was all a dream” meme.

Conclusion

In the end I really enjoyed the remake. Probably more than the Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake. More than the My Bloody Valentie remake (which I did quite like) and as such I think Sam can give Dean some good-natured ribbing on the next episode of Supernatural.

Would you like it? I would wager that if you enjoy slasher films, you most certainly will. If horror films aren’t your thing, especially slasher films, then no. It’s a genre that perhaps requires more of an aquired taste than others.